23 Reasons Why Winter Is The Biggest Jerk Of All The Seasons

Mr_Incognito Published 11/23/2014

You're early, Winter, and no one is happy to see you.

1.
Hey Winter, ever heard the phrase "coming on too strong"?
2.
Thanks to you, all the stuff on my porch is ruined.
3.
Suddenly no one can live without milk, bread, or eggs.
4.
I forgot to rake the leaves, so now I get to shovel them snow which is twice as hard and looks like crap.
5.
I didn't have time to put on warm pants. Or a coat.
6.
And the gloves have conspired against me.
7.
I managed to find my hat, but every time I take it off...
8.
Your early arrival sent college girls into premature moon boot frenzy.
9.
Flat surfaces are no longer safe.
10.
I have to get up 2 hours early just to dig my car out.
11.
And once it's out the brakes are worthless.
12.
Tires, too.
13.
And all my friends with 4WD vehicles are so smug.
14.
15.
I enjoyed about two weeks without paying for AC or heat. Those days are now over, thanks to you, Winter.
16.
The sanctity of Sunday Football has been jeopardized.
17.
OK only in Buffalo. But it's Buffalo, what else do they HAVE?!
18.
My bathroom has become a torture chamber.
19.
And don't even get me started on the bedroom.
20.
My motivation to workout has dipped to below zero, just like the temperature.
21.
I didn't check the weather before bed. Now my cat hates me.
22.
And all this snow makes people think they can start skipping holidays. Which makes me and Batman slappy.
23.
But perhaps most cruel is that you've made Florida seem like a good place to live. And for that we can never forgive you.

1.
Hey Winter, ever heard the phrase "coming on too strong"?
2.
Thanks to you, all the stuff on my porch is ruined.
3.
Suddenly no one can live without milk, bread, or eggs.
4.
I forgot to rake the leaves, so now I get to shovel them snow which is twice as hard and looks like crap.
5.
I didn't have time to put on warm pants. Or a coat.
6.
And the gloves have conspired against me.
7.
I managed to find my hat, but every time I take it off...
8.
Your early arrival sent college girls into premature moon boot frenzy.
9.
Flat surfaces are no longer safe.
10.
I have to get up 2 hours early just to dig my car out.
11.
And once it's out the brakes are worthless.
12.
Tires, too.
13.
And all my friends with 4WD vehicles are so smug.
14.
15.
I enjoyed about two weeks without paying for AC or heat. Those days are now over, thanks to you, Winter.
16.
The sanctity of Sunday Football has been jeopardized.
17.
OK only in Buffalo. But it's Buffalo, what else do they HAVE?!
18.
My bathroom has become a torture chamber.
19.
And don't even get me started on the bedroom.
20.
My motivation to workout has dipped to below zero, just like the temperature.
21.
I didn't check the weather before bed. Now my cat hates me.
22.
And all this snow makes people think they can start skipping holidays. Which makes me and Batman slappy.
23.
But perhaps most cruel is that you've made Florida seem like a good place to live. And for that we can never forgive you.